I work with dogs so the downside is that I have to pick up a lot of their poop, but the upside is that they don’t think it smells like roses. I think it’s crazy when you hear stories about celebrities who think they are better than everyone. Why are they different than anyone else? I mean, set aside the fact that they have enough money to buy a person to literally carry them around so their feet never even have to touch the ground, other than that, what’s separating them from us? But some of them, really like to believe it. I just heard that included in Mariah Carey’s contract for what she wants in her dressing room are a bunch of puppies and kittens. Yes, real, live puppies and kittens. What do you think she does with them after her show? Probably eats them.
The Olympics started. I like watching them. I do not necessarily enjoy watching a lot of other sporting events, but the Olympics is interesting in it’s own way. I like how the networks are constantly switching sports on ya. I sit down to watch some beach volleyball or gymnastics and as soon as the match or event is over, it switches to swimming. It’s always swimming too, I never knew there were so many different ways to compete in swimming, I actually think there’s an Olympic event of the game Marco Polo in the pool. But what I mean is, after a usual sports event on tv, they spend hours talking about and interviewing the players about what happened during the game. No thank you, I just wanna see the action, not what overweight ex-players have to say about what they thought went wrong or right. The track and field is always a big event. Speaking of running, I just got those toe shoes, you know, the ones where it’s like your bare-footed without having to worry about catching the Hiv from whatever is living on the roads you run on. I like them, and I was prepared not too. They are actually pretty awesome, even if they make me look like a whacko wannabee, anarchist of the sneaker world.
One more thing about beach volleyball and gymnastics. I wish I could get a swimsuit that didn’t fall off or give me wedgies whenever I wear it. I went to the beach a few weeks ago, and with every wave that hit me, I had to hold on tighter and tighter to make sure my bathing suit was not rolling into the surf without me in it. Guys have it a little easier because their suits just look like shorts, but what’s with the pockets? Do you really think anything is going to stay securely in those things as they bubble up, turning inside out and float on the surface? There is a lot that doesn’t make sense in the world. Pockets on men’s bathing suits is just one of them. But, if there is anything that would make me feel right about the world again, it’s that when Mariah Carey returns to her dressing room, she finds that all of the cute, cuddly innocent little puppies and kittens that she has ‘rented’ to make her feel loved, have showed their appreciation by pooping all over her designer dresses, white curtains, and peeing in her special mineral water. So Mariah my friend, let me be the first to tell you, that puppies, while being fuzzy and adorable, produce some of the foulest smelling number two, that I’ve ever had the displeasure of cleaning up.
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There have been a lot of colds and sicknesses going around lately. It makes me think what do ninjas do when they are sick? I wouldn’t think that they could go to work and do their ninja things while they were sick. I mean for the obvious reasons like, what if they sneeze? I know you can sneeze quietly, but could you sneeze totally silently? You’re always gonna have that heave of air that comes out and come on seeing a ninja 
People are so funny about free samples. Free anything really. They flock to it like starved vampires in the night. Do vampires flock? I wonder if a bunch of Vampires would be called a flock. Although if I ever needed to say ‘there goes a flock of Vampires’ I think I would be more worriedabout the blood sucking monsters than what I should be referring to them as. Vampires are really all the rage now. Them and Zombies. Although I feel like Vampires are like the rockstars and 
I feel like I’ve lost a lot of my creativity since when I was a little Mindy. I used to see a cardboard box and think, “aw cool, a fort, or a spaceship or a stuffed animal bus!” Now I see a cardboard box and I think, “aw cool, a fort, or a spaceship or a stuffed animal bus! Too bad, I will never touch that cardboard box because someone is most likely living in it.” Lately I’ve been wondering what all the hype is about unicorns. Aren’t they just horses with a horn? Why don’t we think 
When I was a little Mindy I always wanted to climb a telephone pole. It always looked so tempting with the little metal handles sticking out the side, seemed like the best climbing tree around. But my mom always told me not to go near them because I would be electrocuted. So I decided back then, that when I was really old, like for my 100th birthday I would finally climb a telephone pole. That way if I do get electrocuted, at least I’d go out with a bang after 
Things that make me smile. Well I gotta go with the top of the list, high fives and Yoohoo. What else boosts your confidence like a strong, way to go, high five. I think there should probably be more high fives at funerals. Think about it, your going through the grieving line, everyone is sad and depressed, what situation could use a well timed high five more than that? I like getting high fives from strangers. It’s always fun because it’s unexpected. 
Hey, so I decided to try something new with my blog. I decided to just write whatever I’m thinking at the time that I start typing. A stream of consciousness blog, if you will. If you ever wondered what it’s like to be inside my head, strap on your wheelie shoes, grab some whoppers and take comfort in knowing that I am crazier than you. Okay, here goes: Things that are big right now. Super heroes. Nope, I can’t be one, they always have really tight